Wish Upon a Green Eyed Angel
by If I Could I Wouldn't
Summary: Nothing goes right for Jace, first he all but offered his soul to some unknown dealer, then he manages to get his heart broken, but maybe it was worth it just to meet Clary, the one person who knows what's it's like to be thrown into something you're not prepared for, something that was never your fault and that you've been warned against your whole life. AH/OOC/AU/Dystopian/HIATUS
1. A Game of Chance

**_Disclaimer_**_**: I don't own any of the characters or ideas, the only things that do belong to me is the plot and any characters I have added.**_

Jace walked into the lobby, his feet making echoing noises on the cold marble tiles. He could almost believe that he wasn't on the run, that he was only here for a vacation, but he couldn't because he wasn't here for a holiday, no he was here to run. Run from his past.

**He had dyed his hair for the occasion and used coloured contacts; he didn't want her to know what she looked like otherwise she would find him wherever he went. The light flashed green and there was a buzzing sound, allowing him to enter the grand building. He made his way down the long corridor, every few metres a door would stand. He heard screams coming from somewhere; don't double-cross **_**her.**_** A light flickered showing him flashes of an open door at the end, it was steel and must have been more than an inch thick. Jace made his way towards it not stopping to hear any of the whimpers and the calls for help. **

**Simon **_**her **_**bodyguard stood in the doorway. "Weapons," he said gruffly, you don't mess with Simon, he may look like a string-bean but he could crush brick with his bare hands without even trying. He was also unswervingly loyal to his employee, **_**her.**_** Jace took out his knife; it gleamed in the dim light like it was glowing. Then he took out his gun, a small revolver, just in case. Simon grunted and took them before stepping aside to reveal a cosy office. **

**A fire flickered in the grate and a huge painting of a horse hung above the mantelpiece, chairs were pushed against walls and a plush rug was under a huge desk. The table was held up by what looked to be two angels grimacing in pain of holding up the thick wood eternally tortured, like Atlas holding up the sky forever in Greek mythology. **

_**She **_**turned around, her scarlet hair like a whip. "So you came," she paused, "I didn't think you would, after all what you want is very hard to do, the price will be quite," she smiled then showing white teeth, "voluminous." **

**Jace stepped forward, "I don't care just do what I ask." **

**The Seelie Queen shrugged, and nodded at Simon. Jace was tackled from behind and forced on to the table, Simon help up his sleeve revealing his arm. "You're going to regret this Jace Herondale," **_**how does she know my name? **_

"**A lifetime of servitude, and to me," she grinned her black eyes twinkling. **

"**Nothing can get you out of this deal Jace, love **_**is **_**priceless." **

**In her hand was a gold band she unclipped it and wrapped around his wrist, locking it in place. "You are mine Jace, until you die."**

Jace shook his head, refusing to go back there. The Seelie Queen was the world's biggest dealer; even the government was scared of her. She could make **anything** happen with the snap of her fingers but it always came with a price and depending on what you asked depended on what you would have to do. Jace wished he'd never gone to her, wished he'd never had his heart broken. What he had asked her was the one wish that would keep him running for the rest of his life. Love. It had all been false though, after two years she had hated him. That's when she came to collect her payment, a life of working for her.

Some people may see it like it was a good thing, but not Jace. All Jace wanted to be was free, like a bird, not trapped in a cage being taught to do tricks until you became like Simon, a shell of a person who relied on another person to put thoughts into his head.

He sighed and entered the elevator heading towards his room, just one more night then he would move away from London. Maybe go back to America.

The doors opened and he stepped out heading towards his room. Number 13. Jace didn't believe in superstition, walking under a ladder, breaking a mirror, stroking a black cat, the number 13. It was all just people trying to find things to pin the blame on for the world ending up like it was, broken. People died on the streets every day from pollution and nobody batted an eyelash. Half the world had shut its borders because they were all dying from some plague. The leaders didn't know what to do. Murder wasn't followed up. And people like The Seelie Queen had shown up, promising that they could make it better, Jace had fallen into that trap. He'd been everywhere, seen everything, but hadn't filled the hole in his heart.

Jace lay down to rest, hoping the nightmares wouldn't come to him that night, not again. He closed his eyes listening to the quiet ticking of the clock when he heard it, a jumble of voices and mumbling. Footsteps heading towards his door, Jace squeezed his eyes shut, they had found him. He got up and put on his jeans, he was tired of running, of hiding, of using false names, hiding behind a mask. I_t couldn't be that bad, could it?_

The door crashed open just as he buckled up his belt. He turned towards the light wincing slightly. Simon stood in the doorway; he said something a four people pranced onto Jace tackling him to the floor. He didn't struggle, there was no point. Why live if you were in pain. It still hurt every day, knowing that he never got what he wanted.

If Simon was surprised that Jace didn't fight back he didn't show it instead he told his soldiers to put him in the back, they did just that throwing him into the steel cage, no one had cars anymore except rich people who could afford to keep it running and buy fuel. As he landed Jace thought he heard something crack, but he was to numb to react to the pain. It would all be over soon. The door slammed shut encasing him in darkness.

.o.O.o.

Clary saw the door open, felt the light on her skin. Another boy was thrown into the van and they set of, Clary heard a crack and winced that must of hurt. She scrambled towards him but he had his eyes closed. _Please don't be dead, please. _Quite suddenly he opened his eyes staring into her, gold and green, he smiled once and reached for her hand. He closed his eyes once more. There were no nightmares.

**_Like it? Love it? Want to give it a big hug ad kiss and want an update right away? Hate it? Want to throw it into a fire then throw the ashes into a sea? _**

**_Leave your comments._**

**_I need a Beta..._**


	2. Cause and Effect

**_Disclaimer_**_**: I don't own any of the characters or ideas, the only things that do belong to me is the plot and any characters I have added**_

Jace woke up to a terrible pounding in his head, like a hive of bees had got trapped and were trying to find a way out. He groaned as everything came rushing back, Simon, the hotel, _her._ _How was she?_ As soon as he had seen her, a sense of overwhelming peace had overcome him; he hadn't felt like that since… He shouldn't dwell in the past, more about the present, it wasn't like time travel existed, and a butterfly wasn't going to change the world, even if you did stand on it.

He heard a whimper and whipped his head around, he shouldn't have done that, his head exploded and black threatened to take him under. He blinked rapidly and breathed deeply. It was _her_ he'd only seen her eyes when he was pushed into the truck; they'd been full of worry and something else…

Looking into those eyes his heart had felt whole not the broken shards he was used to that suffocated him, made him want to rip the world apart, to find her. He never would and even if he did she wouldn't take him back, she had someone else.

"**But you can't leave, I need you, you don't know what I've done for you-" **

**She cut him off her blue eyes cutting into him. "What you did for me, you have done nothing. You say you care about me, you say you love me but it is all lies. Lie after lie after lie. I can't believe I ever trusted you! When were you going to tell me that you're an assassin, when were you going to tell me you made a DEAL." **

**He was on the floor now, silent tears marking tracks down his cheeks. "Please stay, I'll explain." **

**His eyes locked with hers holding her there, "Kaelie, don't go, please stay, with me." **

**She sneered, turned on her heal and left. **

**His heart caved in smashing like glass, every sharp piece buried and held. He moved and the aching pain came back. He was lost, his compass was gone. She had left him for someone else, all because of his past, all that he had done to get her, she didn't understand, couldn't understand. **_**It was all a lie.**_** His world was a lie, his deal was a lie, he was just a small piece in a much larger puzzle and he wasn't in control. He had never been in control.**

**His father was right 'To Love Is to Destroy.' He was the boy who never cried again.**

.o.O.o.

Clary saw his eyes glaze over, like fog over water. He started trembling, _was he alright?_ She felt an indescribable connection to him, as if they'd known each other their whole lives. Two parts of the same piece, but she wasn't going to fall into that trap, it had happened once and now she was a broken wreck floating in the lost sea, heading in no particular direction.

She had never made a deal, hadn't even considered it, it was a metaphorical death sentence, it always ended badly, like it had for her dad. She hadn't known what he had been promised or what he had to give in return but now she knew, his daughter.

_When your daughter reached the age of our choosing we will take her, you will never see her again, make the time last. _Her farther, is she could still call her that, had made her life a living hell. He'd made it his life goal to pick on every fault and punish her for it.

**They were sat at the grand table, they had lots of money enough to last them lifetime even if they didn't work, they just finished and Valentine was glaring at her across the table, his dark eyes full of hate, waiting to see if she would make a mistake. **

**Jonathan stood up and his chair scraped against the wooden floor, Valentine eyes flickered to him, "pick your chair up." He muttered and his gaze returned back to Clary. **

**Jonathan nodded once and took his plate and started towards the counter. **

"**Want help?" Clary wanted to please her farther maybe she wouldn't get hit tonight.**

**Jonathans gaze rested on her, "no I'm fine." That's when he tripped the plate flew into the air juices flying. **

**Valentine jumped up, "Clarissa, seems like you caused this little mess, I expect you to clean it up."**

**He leaned closer, "meet me in my office." With that he turned and walked away, no doubt formulating a suitable punishment for her. **

**Clary whimpered, so much for pleasing him.**

He had cared about her, in his twisted way; he had believed he was helping her. _He deserved everything he got. _The night before they had taken her she had found him in the bath, his arms slit, eyes vacant and devoid of emotion. The image was burned in her mind, she would never forget that but she couldn't over look everything he had done to her, what he had turned her into. She would never forget.

.o.O.o.

Jace came back to reality to find _her_ staring at him, he raised an eyebrow and she blushed looking away.

"What's your name?" His voice came out hoarse, just speaking burned his throat.

She looked back at him, her sharp green eyes wary. "You first," her voice was so quiet he though he imagined it.

"Jace," he said, "my name is Jace."

She nodded slightly, and repeated it back to him, _Jace, _as is she was testing it. He liked the way it sounded when she said it, as if it was something exotic.

"I'll repeat, what's your name," She rolled her eyes and smiled slightly, not fazed by him.

"Clary, my name is Clary." She shivered and wrapped her arms around herself, conserving heat.

Jace scooted closer to her and she flinched.

"Relax; I'm not going to hurt you."

Clary nodded and let him wrap his arms round her; his skin heating at her touch; she rested her head against her chest and closed her eyes.

"Goodnight Jace," she whispered.

"Goodnight Clary." Jace said though he didn't think she heard him.

.o.O.o.

Jace scooted towards her, she flinched and he stopped, his features softened stretching into a slow smile, "I won't hurt you." She nodded, he wasn't like Valentine. He wrapped her in his strong arms covering her in an blanket warmth. Everywhere there bare skin touched it felt like fire, warm, strong, unquenchable. She relaxed against him and rested her head on his chest.

"Goodnight Jace," and as she faded into the welcome security of sleep.

"Goodnight Clary." A tug in her chest. _Thank you._

They both fell asleep to the sound of each other hearts beating.

.o.O.o.

Screams echoed down the empty hallway, wails and sobs bounced around like a suffocating cacophony of noise. Jace winced as each sound reverberated round his head. When did his life change so much?

He could hardly recognise himself; his mask had become his reality, he was Jace Lightwood, he hadn't used his birth name in a long time. Herondale. That name got him places but it was a curse, she had found him, with its help, just as she had promised.

The only thing that kept him going now was the girl in his arms, she needed protecting, so delicate, he would protect her, I swear on the Angel. Jace tightened his arms around her, what did she do to get here? He would ask her, nothing could be as bad as what he had done, how did it come to this?

It was his twelfth birthday; his dad had said he had to talk to him; Jace made his was to his father's office, his bare feet sinking into the soft carpet, what does father want?

He knocked on the door, "Come in," a gruff voice replied and Jace stepped into the room. As always he marvelled his surroundings, everything was pristine, clean and organised. His father was sitting at his desk.

He and Jace were almost identical apart from their eyes; Jace had his mother's while his father had cold blue ones that seemed to cut through you like ice.

"Sit down, Jace," Jace carefully walked and sat on the chair, sinking into the soft material.

"Now Jace, I have called you here to warn you against," Stephan paused, "have you ever heard of the term, 'The Devils Deal.'"

Jace nodded, it was said that the Devil, Lucifer, would make any deal with you, give you anything, the only drawback, after ten years he would send his demons after you to drag you into Hell.

Stephan eyed him warily, "the term had become more," he searched for the right world, "used lately."

Jace raised an eyebrow, "how so father?"

"Jace this is serious, no time for making jokes, in the past few years' the world has been slowly falling apart. People have arisen calling themselves 'Dealers.' The most well-known of these people is called 'The Seelie Queen,' she has more power than even The Clave which at this time is our government. These dealers take the legend very seriously, they can grant you anything, but will ask something in return, it is even said that they take children. Do you understand?" He was on his feet, staring down at his son, Jace nodded.

"Don't," Stephan leaned closer, over the desk, "ever fall for it Jonathan Christopher Herondale, it's all a lie." With that he left the room leaving Jace staring blankly at the space his father was just standing.

"I won't make promises I can't keep."

.o.O.o.

Clary opened her eyes and looked up to find Jace smiling down on her, "Hey Red."

He smirked; she just rolled her eyes and laid her head back on his chest. He smirked again, "I know I have a gorgeous body, just no need to drool over it."

Great, I have to deal with an egotistical, arrogant beautiful guy while I'm trying to stay alive, just great.

"Morning to you to Jace, did you get any sleep?"

Jace grinned, "No,"

Clary frowned, "why not?"

"Too busy trying to block out your snores, and I did hear my name, quite a few times," Clary tried to hide to ever-rising blush behind her hair, why was she so pale.

"I hate to interrupt but can you shut up, I have to listen to you," the voice was so sudden both of them jumped. Jace recovered quickly and glanced at Clary who had blushed an even darker red, so cute.

Jace shook himself and looked around; they were in a small box size room, the colour scheme, grey. The bed was had grey sheets and pillow, the steel door was dull, old and used. The floor was concrete and the walls a dull brick. He didn't see anywhere another person could hide, "who the hell are you? And why were you listening to us talking?"

One of the bricks was removed and a green, yellow eye appeared, it reminded Jace of a cat's eye. "I can't not listen to you; your cell is next to mine."

Jace raised his eyebrows, "Cell?"

"Where did you think you were? The Ritz?" Magnus raised his eyebrows and Clary stiffened a laugh.

Magnus' eyes grew wide and he shoved the brick back into place, suddenly the door to the cell opened with such strength that some of the brick fell to the floor. Clary jumped backwards, into Jaces' embrace, he wrapped his arms around her. In the doorway stood another of The Seelie Queens loyal puppies, he had white blond hair and black eyes that seemed to swallow the pupils.

"What do we have here?" The guy came closer and Clary shuddered, it couldn't be him, he's dead.

"Jonathan?" Jonathan smirked, "I go by Sebastian around these parts, now you, Jace? This way,"

Sebastian roughly pulled Jace away from Clary, that's going to leave bruises. "Now dear sister, the fun begins." And with that Jonathan or Sebastian as he liked to be called slammed the door shut.

Magnus took the brick back out, "that bastard is your brother?"

Clary looked at him sadly, "my brother died eight years ago, when I was sixteen, I don't know what that thing is."

**_Like it? Love it? Want to give it a big hug ad kiss and want an update right away? Hate it? Want to throw it into a fire then throw the ashes into a sea? _**

**_Leave your comments._**

**_I need a Beta..._**


	3. Four

**_Disclaimer_**_**: I don't own any of the characters or ideas, the only things that do belong to me is the plot and any characters I have added**_

Sebastian lead Jace down the corridor not unlike the one he had travelled down seven years ago, when he had first made his deal. He wondered how a monster like this could be related to an angel like Clary, who had a childlike innocence to her. She hadn't seen the world for what it was, he parents had made sure of that, but judging from the way she flinched at his every touch she hadn't had the best experience of it either. _Why would anyone hurt a person like her, so sweet and beautiful and kind and… _

The list was endless, he knew he was selfish for wanting her, a monster like him didn't deserve her love, but he wanted it, so badly his heart felt like it would burst out of his chest at any moment if he didn't kiss her or even hold her. Her mere presence was a comfort he desperately needed, she was worth fighting for.

.o.O.o.

Magnus placed the brick back into the wall, knowing what was going to happen next, even if she, Clary didn't. He sat down next to Alec who was huddled in the corner, away from the door. He knew what was going to happen too, it had happened to him. He used to trust everyone, always looking for the best in people; he was a glass half full kind of person. Until they broke him, now he was ultra-paranoid and only the saw the worst in people, the Alec Magnus loved was gone but he could still see him, hidden, that was why Magnus stayed. He held onto the blind hope they he could fix the damage and get his Alec back, and he would never give up.

.o.O.o.

Jace was shoved down the stairs almost tripping and falling into the gloom; he regained his balance and continued down. They soon entered into a small dark room, it was just like the cell but without the bed and window, instead they had chains and an assortment of torture equipment set onto a bench.

.o.O.o.

Sebastian grinned and cracked his knuckles, he loved his job, he loved working on a certain person until he saw them crack, loved the feeling that he was moulding a new person out of the old one, but most of all he loved the screams as he ripped away their skin inch by inch.

Jace wouldn't be any different but he would enjoy it much more than he did the others, he seemed like a survivor, he had been running for five years, longer than anyone else he had worked on. This is going to be fun.

.o.O.o.

Screams ripped down the hallway, breaking off then starting again, over and over until it was all that Clary heard, she wanted to fling the door open and comfort Jace, tell him she could help. That she understood. That she would always be there.

But she couldn't, how could she when she didn't know **if** she would always be there?

.o.O.o.

Sebastian leaned down next to Jace, it was time. "Given up brother?"

Jace turned his head slightly and spat in his face_. I am no brother of yours._

Sebastian eyes reflected pure rage aimed at Jace, how dare he spit at him, he was his superior. The edges of his mouth lifted slightly at the thought of what he was going to do, _serve's you right brother_.

He took out the syringe; it was filled with a dark cloudy liquid that swirled on its own accord, his face broke into a grin, but it was all wrong, a mad man's grin.

He jabbed the point into Jaces arm, blood spurted everywhere heading in all directions like a starfish, he pushed down and the mixture entered the golden boy's bloodstream. _See how you like that, time to face your fears._ He grabbed the nearby chair and sat down, ready to watch the show.

.o.O.o.

**The Fear of Losing Control**

He didn't know where he was, there was just a brilliant bright light, Jace blinked and his vision cleared, then her realised, he was on an aeroplane.

He was sitting by the window looking out on London's night lights as is disappeared below him, how did he get here, he didn't remember anything from that night at the hotel and even that was fuzzy.

Men, Simon, shouting… Did he escape? Was this a test?

Jace shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts, and relaxed back into his seat.

"Are you alright Sir, you look ill." He jumped up at the voice and looked over to the person sitting beside him. She was small, around 5" with bright carrot coloured hair and big emerald green eyes that dominated her face giving her a child-like appearance.

"Sir?" The girl frowned.

Jace shook himself again then dropped a smile, "sorry, just tired, names Jace…" He left the sentence hoping she would fill in the blanks.

She flashed him a grin, "Clary, Clary Fray," she offered out her hand and he gladly took it, she was so small, his hand engulfed her own.

"So, where are you heading?" Jace asked her, filling in the silence, Clary beamed at him,

"New York, I'm returning from a wedding." She nodded to herself.

"Who's?" Jace tried to make his tone light.

She gave him another questioning look, "my best friends, Simon and Izzy," she pointed over to the other side of the plane; I leaned forward and saw a geeky looking kid next to a gorgeous girl with long dark hair.

"Really?" He lifted an eyebrow, they didn't seem like the most likely couple, she nodded seriously, "really."

She smiled again_, is she bipolar or is it just me?_

"So why you goin' to NY?" Jace started to give his answer. "My ex-"

When the plane lurched, Clary let out a little scream.

"Scared at st-" Jace was cut off again by as something crashed into the side of the plane, ripping one of its wings of and sending them into a tailspin.

The plane tilted and Clary was forced up against him and she clung onto to him as the plane turned the other way sending bags and others objects flying round the aircraft.

The lights went out casting them into darkness. Then a load siren started wailing and a red emergency beam cast long shadows.

They were going to die and Jace couldn't do anything about it, he saw the ground grow closer, he felt Clarys small body cling onto him, he heard the wind in his ears.

Everything went black.

.o.O.o.

**The Fear of Failing Someone**

Jace woke up with a start, that had been a weird dream, planes, crashes, and Izzy and Simon getting married, that was the most ridiculous thing he had ever thought.

Izzy was too busy with Jordan and Simon had Maia, but if she left, and he wouldn't blame her if she did, he always could turn to Dungeons and Dragons.

A loud beeping noise brought his out of his daydreams, _what the hell?_ Jace flung back the covers and went over to his desk, his phone was ringing.

**CLARY MOB**, what had he done now?

He picked it up to a frantic voice, "Where are you, I've been here fifteen minutes, waiting, I've called you a least a dozen times, why didn't you pick up? I'm going if you don't get here in the next five minutes."

The phone went dead, Jace had known Clary for most of his life, and had had a secret crush on her since their first meeting. Finally he had asked her out in their 11th (junior) year, two years from then and they were still together.

Jace was sure he loved her.

He had arranged to meet her at the cinema to watch 'The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones' today, how had he forgot?

He quickly got changed and ran to his car, not bothering with his seatbelt, it was only a few minutes away, and he could get there. He drove round past the corner shop, the tyre slipping onto the pavement.

He quickly parked his car, not caring that it was on the yellow lines and raced round the corner to Clary. She's standing waiting for Jace, when she sees him her face morphs into a smile before she remembers that she's supposed to be angry.

Jace walked up to her and pulls her into his arms, "I missed you."

She looks up at him, "it's only been a few hours," Jace smiled; being apart from her made him feel like part of him was missing. "I know."

He leans down for a kiss when a chough interrupts them; he looked up to see Magnus, in all his sparkly glory.

He pushes himself off the wall, "so are we going to watch this movie or what?"

He looks expectantly at them, "everyone else is inside."

Jace looks over at Clary and raises an eyebrow, "what? It's polite to ask."

He chuckled and wrapped an arm over her shoulder, "never mind."

.o.O.o.

"Did you see that Jape kid do that flip, oh and that Semon person is so sweet…"

The girls were talking about the film, not that Jace minded; it was cool, full of action and romance. Though the names were weird, Jape and Semon?

Clary walked over to him, "Jace, if a demon came after me would you protect me?"

He shook his head, demons weren't real, she knew that.

"Sure I would, I'll protect you against everything, except Izzy." He added, he face paled, they were going to Pandemonium tonight, it was all Magnus' idea, he had a crazy theory that Alec was really just as wild at party's as he was and had ended up dragging along everyone else. Which meant that Izzy was going to have to dress up Clary.

They finally arrived at the institute, where Jace and his adopted family lived, he didn't even get to say good bye as Izzy dragged her off to dress her up.

He watched after her, then followed them inside hoping to see her one last time before she was sucked into the black hole Izzy called a bedroom.

.o.O.o.

"Jace, come on." Clary was dragging him into the alley behind the club, he followed her, if she wasn't anything she was stubborn. She guided him down into the darkness, _I swear she planned this_.

"Jace?" She asked as he stopped, hearing a noise, he put a finger to his lips; she understood immediately and came to stand behind him.

Again, closer, shuffling, "who's there?" He called into the alley.

"Who do you think?" Jace tensed, Sebastian.

He came into view, his dark eyes flickering with amusement, "what do we have here? My sister going off with the Herondale, is this you're new toy Jace? I feel like it's my duty to protect her."

There was something in his hand, the light reflected of it, "bye." Sebastian flicked his wrist sending the knife flying towards him.

But it never reached its target.

Clary flew in front of him, and the knife impaled her small body. She stumbled back towards Jace.

He grabbed her and lowered her down; Sebastian was gone, disappearing into the shadows.

"Clary..." He broke off in sobs; her eyes were lifeless and empty.

He had failed her, he said he would protect her, and he hadn't even said he loved her. I love you Clary. But it wasn't worth anything; he had failed her, like Sebastian said he would.

.o.O.o.

**The Fear of Being Alone**

He loved her, she knew that. He had told her, every day, he had wanted to tell her for the rest of his life; no amount of time with her was enough. Why did she leave, why wasn't he good enough.

She had left for rat face, chosen Simon over him, the only girl he wanted he couldn't have. He had thought she loved him like he did, like there was nothing else in the world, that he could survive even if all he had was her.

Nothing had mattered before her, everything was in shades of grey, with her everything was vibrant, red, green, blue, yellow. Nothing was dull, everything was perfect.

She still left; it was like she had never cared in the first place.

He'd talked to Magnus; he said she was scared, of him, of love?

He was broken.

Every day was the same, get up, go to work, come home, do work, go to sleep. Nothing ever changed. He couldn't live without her.

.o.O.o. (**1****st**** Person/Time ****Jump)**

She came back. I had to watch, she placed the key in the lock and turned, she came back, for me? Her hair was down, tumbling like a waterfall against her back. Her green eyes were wide and wet, rimmed with red, why had she been crying, because of him?

"Jace?" Her voice cracked; didn't she know I was here?

She dropped her bag, the noise filling the empty silence, she made her way around checking each room until she got to the bedroom, then the bathroom, I screamed at her to stop, to turn, to run, she paid no attention, or rather couldn't.

The door, it opened, and I saw him, in the bathtub surrounded by red water, wrists slit.

I tried to reach her but I couldn't, she cried, I couldn't comfort her, I couldn't wait, why didn't I wait?

The truth, it was too much, without her I wasn't living, I never was.

.o.O.o.

I was there but I wasn't, I was dead but I was alive, I saw but I was blind, my wrists were slit but they were whole.

Because when I looked at the dead man floating in the stained waters, all I saw was myself and what wasn't, but when I looked in the mirror, and saw the same tanned arms holding my beautiful red-head, I saw what could've been.

.o.O.o. (**Back to 3****rd**** Person)**

**The Fear of Being a Survivor**

It was just a normal day, the sun was shining, the birds were singing. Jace never thought something bad could happen is everything was perfect, how wrong he was.

He was going to dinner to meet Clary's parents, not that he hadn't meet them, he'd been to their house loads of times to pick up Clary but today they were all going out, to celebrate.

He walked back to his home, an old warehouse, he remembered painting it with Clary and her mum, both were masters with a paintbrush and pencil, all he'd done was stand back and watched a masterpiece unfold.

He took out his keys, and selected the right one. A key was neon green from its dip in the paint pot, courtesy of Clary.

That brought a smile to his lips, she always brought a smile to his face, his eyes would light up, he would stand taller he would genuinely smile not smirk.

She was his saviour; Izzy had once described it like he had woken up and all because of Clary.

He unlocked the door, welcoming the cool air that rushed out to meet him; he flicked on the lights, to find his whole apartment upturned.

Glass was mashed, chairs were missing their legs, and long scratches ran across the floor and walls. _What the hell?_

Jace heard a noise and his head whipped round, it was coming from the bedroom, he made his way towards the door careful not to step on anything, he picked up a plank of wood that was lying around.

He then tapped on the door, opening it gently, another small whimper came from the room and he walked in, Clary was on the floor, tape was covering her mouth and rough ropes held her hands and feet in place.

When she saw him she started frantically struggling against her ropes binding her, _calm down_, a blinding pain on the back of his head, then all went black.

.o.O.o.

He woke up to find himself tied up, just as Clary had been.

Standing before him was Sebastian, her brother.

He struggled but it was no use, he must have gone to scouts.

"Well, well, well, prince charming awakes, just in time; I was afraid I was going to have to kiss you." Sebastian smiled; _at least I don't have tape over my mouth like Clary_.

"I never thought you ran for that team bur… Why am I here exactly?"

The black-eyed boy raised an eyebrow, "to watch everyone you pledged to protect die, it's much more upsetting than you dying yourself."

Jace's eyes widened, "you would kill your own sister?" He shrugged, "if you can't beat them, take them out." He grinned manically, "but first your mummy and daddy."

Jace tried again to free himself from his restraints. Sebastian walked over to the back of the room and grabbed Celine Herondale, bringing her forward, "ready?"

Jace watch helplessly as Sebastian took out a knife and put it to his mother's wrist. He drew it across them and watched, a grin forming on his face, as her blood spilled over the floor coving the floorboards in a pattern of red, he shoved her back towards the bed, leaving her to die.

Next came his father Stephan, the man struggled under the boys grasp, "stop moving, or I'll kill him, slowly." Stephan stopped and was promptly killed by a stab wound to his stomach.

After came both Jocelyn, beaten to death and Luke, cyanide poisoning.

Finally, Clary, Jace doubled his efforts but to no avail, she gently shook her head, the tape had somehow fallen off her mouth, _I love you_, he whispered it back.

Her brother made it quick, straight to the heart.

Sebastian looked him over, looked at his tears, snorted then jumped out the window. Jace was left staring at the dead bodies of those he loved. Left staring into the eyes of the most person important thing in the world to him. Left him the only one left. Left him the lone survivor.

.o.O.o.

Jace woke up gasping, _what was that?_

Sebastian was sitting on his chair, a wide smile spread across your face.

"You have a thing for my sister," his smile grew wider, "perfect." He grabbed Jace and forced him back up the stairs, then half-dragged half-lead Jace back down to his cell. But instead of going back into the one that contained Clary, he shoved him into the one opposite, "separation will help." He muttered before slamming the door shut.

Jace was alone, in more ways than one.

**_Like it? Love it? Want to give it a big hug ad kiss and want an update right away? Hate it? Want to throw it into a fire then throw the ashes into a sea? _**

**_Leave your comments._**

**_I need a Beta..._**


	4. Fire and Ashes

_********__Disclaimer__**: I don't own any of the characters or ideas, the only things that do belong to me is the plot and any characters I have added**_

Simon was on his bed, thinking. He had never wanted to do what he did, which was basically being paid for having no feelings. He did what he was ordered to, thinking nothing of it, before her he hadn't been sorry, they had obviously done something to land them in this situation. But he didn't believe that she could have done anything wrong. He smiled, for once in a long time, he felt something. He had believed himself a monster, living of other torment, but now he cared, not enough to directly go against his boss, but enough to take a leap and hope, for once in his life, that it would work out. Maybe.

A high buzzing interrupted his thoughts, dinner time. He sighed and pushed himself of the comfortable pillows. It was time to change; all he needed was a push. He wouldn't really miss anything, what sick human being could enjoy hurting people? His question was answered when he heard screams, Sebastian, who else?

Sebastian had appeared two years ago, even then he was mean and cruel, after just a couple of days he had been promoted to torture master, and that was the pleasant term. But Sebastian was just one side of the coin; he was sometimes Jonathan, the boy who missed his sister. Though he was hardly made an appearance anymore, and now that his sister was back, it had got worse. He seemed to want to make her life like his, a living hell, he was truly a demon.

Simon knew how he worked, first he asked, those who knew what he was he was capable of would drop to their knees and beg, if they didn't do that next came the beatings and whippings. If they weren't broken by then Sebastian would bring out his biggest weapon. He gave them a drug which would make them heal faster, almost instantly; he would proceed to slice long, deep gashes into their arms. He would place rusted clips into the wounds forcing them apart so they couldn't repair. If you were lucky he would leave you be, then you would probably die of blood poisoning, if not he would rub in acidic liquids and materials into the wound. If you hadn't broken by then, another round of drugs but this time, instead of seeing Sebastian you would see the person you loved most, you would have to watch your sister/brother, husband/wife, girlfriend/boyfriend slowly kill you. And finally, if you were still going, another injection, forcing you into an almost coma like state, forcing you to face all of your fears, he would repeat this all day, every day, until you were dead or bent to his wishes.

The first was most likely.

Simon pushed his thoughts aside, no point in thinking that, it would get him nowhere. He picked up the prisoners meals, not dwelling on what was put into them. First, Maia and Jordan, he liked to think he had a connection with people if he knew their names and their story. They had come here in heavy dept. They had then been dragged back five years later and had been sold to the government to test on; they were going two weeks from now.

The next cell contained Raphael and Celine, they had come asking for total control over the districts that they lived on; they were going to be used as walking, talking blood bags.

The next few never talked to Simon, preferring to suffer in silence, they consisted of Eric, Matt and Kirk.

Magnus and Alec, they were always fun to talk to, if Alec was in the mood, some days he would be crying in the corner clinging on to Magnus like he was a life-raft in the middle of an empty ocean.

A red-headed girl, she stared at him with wide eyes, like a scared rabbits. Simon leaned against the hatch, "hey."

The girl smiled slightly, "hey," she almost whispered it.

"I'm Simon."

"Clary."

"What did you do to get here?"

She was silent. _Guess that's that._

He reached for the hatch when she answered, "my father."

_Poor girl, it wasn't even her fault._ Another buzz, he only had ten minutes left, "sorry I have to go, we'll talk later."

He went to the one opposite her and slid in the bowl of food. He knew there was someone in here but he couldn't see them, _their loss._ It was probably Jace, the guy he had been chasing for five years.

The last door was here, right there, he would see her. Even though he knew that he never had a chance with her he still savoured every moment they had together. He opened the hatch and slid in the food along with some other food items he could find, an apple and some bread.

"Isabelle?" His voice sounded small. Hardly any light entered this room, and then she came into view, long black hair, deep dark blue eyes that verged on black. If he didn't know better he would say they **were **black, only he could see they weren't. _Beautiful. _

And even though it was unrequited, Simon knew he loved her and he would hold onto that, like an anchor in the storm.

.o.O.o.

Sebastian made he was to the head office, he was in a good mood today; last night had been a success, at least on his part. Seelie had called for him and like a good little puppy he had come.

She though he was his bitch, following her every word to the letter, not that she knew how he really felt. He was panning something and it wouldn't disappoint, he just needed to tick one thing off his list. Destroy Jace and all he held dear to him, even if it that was his sister.

He couldn't describe it, he felt an uncontrollable loathing towards Jace, as soon as he had laid eyes on his he hadn't been able to feel anything but hatred towards him. His pain was like a drug, better than being drunk in the screams of others, much better.

And Sebastian decided then and there that if it was the last thing he did, he would break Jace beyond repair, so he walked the earth like a shadow, there but not.

If anyone was there to watch Sebastian they would have told you that his face had contorted into the most hideous expression they had seen on a human being, but they would also say, that it was unmistakeably a smile.

.o.O.o.

The one thing that The Seelie Queen hated about this job was paperwork; it was piling up like a mound on her desk. She couldn't keep track of everything inside her head. Not like that Scar person she heard people talking about, apparently she was nineteen and was already notorious for harsh punishments. A knock brought her back to the present.

It was, of course Sebastian.

"Enter," he swaggered in, looking full of himself.

One to many times Seelie had thought of ordering his execution, each time she had dismissed it as a foolish idea, he was the best at what he did, earning results in days rather than weeks. She knew he took pleasure in what he did and she was disgusted by it; even she who had entered this profession knowing full well what it entitled found it repulsive.

Something was wrong with him; something demonic ran though his reins, made him a monster.

"You called, I answered." He flopped into the chair in front of her desk, all manners out the window.

Seelie raised an eyebrow, "was it successful?"

Sebastian grinned, "yes, though he does seen to have a strange fixation with my sister," his eyes were cold and black, like a winters night, "but he should know, she belongs to me!" He snarled.

Seelie kept her face blank, hiding her emotions,_ what sick bastard wants his sister?_ "good, we can use her, he needs to be taught a lesson, never run from The Seelie Queen."

Sebastian looked bored; he'd had this convocation many a time, her ranting about how good she was, it tired him. "Yes, yes, does that mean I can use her? You can test out that new drug you made, it worked wonders on Jace."

The Seelie Queen scowled, "she already has it in her system, what do you think her father asked for? He used to test on his children, even you."

Sebastian smirked, "just shows why I'm superior to everyone."

Seelie shook her head and made no attempt to hide her grin, "you don't understand, he didn't just test on his children, he also gave it to his best friend's son."

He raised an eyebrow, "name?"

"Jace Herondale, the boy with the angel blood."

Sebastian scoffed, "angel blood? No such thing."

Seelie gave a light laugh, "angel is its street name, it gives you heightened senses and a feeling of euphoria, but, "she leaned forward, "if given to before birth, you will have it running through you. As far as I know only two people have these proprieties, Jace and your sister, Clary. It makes them linked, one can't live without the other, therefore their attraction."

Sebastian was grinning, "so if I kill one, the other will be broken?"

"Under no circumstances will you kill either of them, angel blood is rare and to have two subjects with it in their blood, they are the produce, you will not kill them."

Sebastian got up to leave, but he stopped at the door, "what about me, if I didn't have angel blood, what did he give me?"

Seelie sighed, "demon blood, it's counter part, it makes you stronger and faster, but, "she held up her finger, "it will slowly drain you of your humanity, until you're an shell of a person incapable of feeling anything except anger and want."

His face was blank, when he finally spoke his voice was filled with hate and malice, "I guess I got the better deal then."

With that he left the room already thinking of ways on how to end The Seelie Queens life, because she was the one who had done this to him, she was the one who had given the drugs to his father. It was only right, he had already killed Valentine, and he was going to do the same for her.

.o.O.o.

Jace was sitting against the wall just next to the door; his food was untouched, where Simon had left it before. His body ached though his injury's had long since healed, a side effect of the first serum. No, he wanted, needed, something, someone, and that person wasn't here.

He didn't want to want her; he hated it in fact, not her, just the feeling of depending on something else. But he felt an undeniable attraction to her, when Sebastian had come in, he had wanted to protect her, he had been so close to kissing her. If Magnus hadn't interrupted, he hadn't felt such hate. What was she doing to him, just being apart from her hurt, bad.

_Clary._

.o.O.o.

"**Hey, slow down," Clary was trying to catch her older brother Jonathan, as always he had disappeared far ahead into the woods at the end of the garden. **

"**Jon?" No answer, **

"**Jon? You're scaring me." **

**Still no answer. **

"**Bubby?" **

**Suddenly warm arms wrapped round her waist and she admitted a high pitched squeal,**

"**What's wrong?"**

**She turned around to the dark eyes of her brother, they were tinted with amusement.**

"**Jon!" She swatted his arms and he laughed but let go of her.**

"**You should have seen your face," he tried and failed to imitate her voice, "bubby?" His lower lip quivered.**

"**I didn't look like that," she tried to be serious but laughter coloured her voice. **

"**Sure you did," he smiled, "I won't tell anyone, as long as you tell me were mum hides the cookies." **

**Clary gasped, "Jon!?"**

**He smirked, "you better believe it."**

**Clary grumbled, "alright, but don't tell anyone." He face scrunched and she pointed a small finger at him.**

**He nodded, "cross my heart and hope to die," he drew an x over his heart.**

**Clary nodded, "follow me."**

Clary woke up from her dream/memory; he had been so sweet then, always looking out for her, not like he was now. Even Magnus agreed and she hardly knew him.

Again the door opened and he was there, Sebastian, "your turn." He muttered and grabbed her, "but first we need to pick up your boyfriend." He turned to the cell opposite hers and shoved the door open; Jace was sitting on the floor, "back for more, I knew you couldn't resist this." He motioned to his body, and in that moment Clary studied him, he had tan skin, natural. Golden hair that reached his shoulders and curled slightly, and honey coloured eyes, tawny. Her fingers itched to draw him and in the pale light it made his face a study in contrasts. _Perfect. _

Sebastian growled low in his throat and wrapped his hand around Jaces' arm, "you're watching."

Jace looked confused as Clary felt, "watching?"

Sebastian smirked, "yes, you're going to watch Clary being forced to go through what you did."

Jace paled, "everything?"

"And more…"

**_Like it? Love it? Want to give it a big hug ad kiss and want an update right away? Hate it? Want to throw it into a fire then throw the ashes into a sea? _**

**_Leave your comments._**

**_I need a Beta..._**


	5. The Big Reveal

_********__Disclaimer__**: I don't own any of the characters or ideas, the only things that do belong to me is the plot and any characters I have added**_

Seelie had decided where the girl was going, in two days' time she, (and the Lightwoods, Herondale and Bane) would all be sent to the Herondale estate, which coincidently one of them happened to be cosines with…

While Sebastian, he was going to be executed, tomorrow. He loved his work, enjoyed it even and in his profession that couldn't be a good sign, he was ruthless, had no mercy and laughed when he saw they wither under his fingers. Nope he had to go, soon.

She took out the files, all six of them, then stamped them with the harsh red colours, staining the paper like blood. DECEASED – six feet under, dead and burned. They were alive but according to these, they were dead.

The walking dead.

It made her chuckle; she had a sick sense of humour.

And why she was doing this?

Money, in Seelie's book, money equaled power second only to knowledge, but being who she was, that wasn't a problem either.

No one could defeat her, she was queen.

.o.O.o.

In his younger years Magnus had meet William Herondale who happened to be in love with his bests friends fiancé.

When they say all's fair in love and war, they are wrong, though Will had loved Tessa more than anybody else, Jem was the one who had been with him throughout all the years.

Bailing him out of the police station when he had been caught mid-fight, stuck through with him when he ranted about his parents and how they suffocated him and gave him no freedom. He was all he had, he tended to avoid his parents and Cecily spent all her time with her boyfriend Gabriel.

He couldn't do that to his brother, even if they weren't biologically related.

So he had watched, watched them fall in love and had pretended everything was fine, that he was happy for them, which he was, but every time he saw them a piece of him broke inside, something that could never be mended.

So that's why he had gone to the Magnus Bane. He had told him everything. How it was his fault Ella had died, how he couldn't control what he felt, how he wanted something he could never have.

The meetings were risky, going outside was a death wish, you could be killed by anyone, whether by a beggar's wanting cash or some hired assassin that has been paid by a dealer to kill you, or , if you were lucky, the very air itself. And that's how Magnus knew that Will was facing the ultimate punishment, finding something to keep them grounded then losing it to something you had always had.

That's when it happened, the inevitable thing that would have happened sooner or later, Jem died.

For years he had had to take a drug to keep living.

They knew it was killing him but he couldn't stop otherwise he would die, right then, right there.

It was what brought them together.

It was in a way what Will had always wanted but he hadn't wanted it like this, not when the reason was because his best friend was dead.

That is what he had thought Tessa was using him as, and he would happily do it, fill in the whole which Jem had left, that was, until she had told him she loved him even before Jem.

See, Tessa had always loved Will, why do you think that just when he had told her he loved her and she had to say 'no', she had burned her hands. The scars upon them served as a reminder of what she had had to give up that day.

But now, even though she had lost Jem, she got Will, maybe the only person who could understand her pain. For those years she was content.

And in that Magnus was happy for Will, in the end he had got the girl, though under the worst circumstances. Together they had filled each other's broken hearts, stuck it together with glue and sticky tape and rubber bands and sellotape and hoped and hoped it would be enough.

As Magnus looked at Alec he couldn't help but see Will, they had the same eyes and hair, blue-violet and midnight black. What do you think attracted him in the first place, certainly not his shy demander, but meeting Will had been a blessing it had brought him to his dear Alexander.

Magnus hoped he would see Will again one last time, just to say thanks, but he knew that would never happen unless Queenie had a change of heart.

He had all but given up hope of getting out of here, that was until Simon came to his door, eyes wide and breath ragged and announced they were going away, away from this place. Away to the Herondale manor, Magnus' smile lifted, he wondered who lived there, surely it couldn't be the William Herondale.

His wish was granted.

.o.O.o.

Isabelle was lonely, she hardly ever had human contact, she only ever saw Simon, he was sweet, always bringing her extra food and talking about little things, nothing related to why she was here. She would often wonder if he did that to the other people here or just her, she'd never had the courage to ask, very unlike her.

He would talk about America and how it was doing, half the population had died and it had closed all its borders to all but private jets and planes. He would tell her about his family and how he had to leave them and take this job to take care of them. He would tell her about Alec and Magnus and how they were doing.

He seemed to except her silence and never pressured her to speak; reading into her body language like no one else could, guessing the answers to the rhetorical questions he asked.

He was perfect, much better than anyone else she had ever met. He seemed to open up around her showing her his very soul, what he liked, what he didn't. His dislike for the new blond and the sweet and caring green-eyed girl with the cell next to hers, that reminded her of someone she had seen at school.

A small girl, about five foot nothing, with the most startling green eyes and fiery red hair, she kept to herself and was always drawing or reading a book. She had tried to speak to her multiple times but she would just shrug and go back to whatever she was doing.

Could it be her?

Had she known someone all these years that had been abused, as Simon had told her, and not known a thing about it.

Then again, when it happened daily you got very good at hiding it.

Simon also told her she, Isabelle was getting moved somewhere, the Herondale mansion on the border between Wales and England. He had said that Magnus, Alec, the blond and the girl with the green eyes were coming too.

But even when she smiled at that she couldn't help but want Simon to come with them, with her. He was the only thing that had stopped her going mad in this place.

Why couldn't he come?

So she told him, but this time not with her eyes, "please come."

.o.O.o.

In all the years, which was two that Isabelle had been here she had never spoken, not once. So when she spoke up Simon did a double take, was he hearing things?

Then again, "come."

No, his Isabelle was speaking, but what did that mean.

"What!?"

Isabelle sighed, "you heard he the first time, I said come, with us I mean, to the Herondale place."

Simon was confused, why would she want him to come with them, he could understand why he would take Isabelle, but why would she…?

"What?"

Isabelle shot him an annoyed glare, "do I have to spell it out? I said come, with me, to the Herondale Mansion."

"With you?" He was still confused.

"Yes, dipstick, are your ears clogged up or something? You deserve to have a break, permanently, with me."

She cared about him, Simon's heart speed, did she, no, no, she couldn't… Maybe, no. But for her anything. "Ok."

_**Yes, that's Magnus with Wills backstory and Sizzy… kind of.**_

**_Like it? Love it? Want to give it a big hug ad kiss and want an update right away? Hate it? Want to throw it into a fire then throw the ashes into a sea? _**

**_Leave your comments._**

**_I need a Beta..._**


	6. Fear and Hope

_********__Disclaimer__**: I don't own any of the characters or ideas, the only things that do belong to me is the plot and any characters I have added**_

_**In this I had to come up with all the things Clary would be afraid of, I came up with three… So I added lots you wouldn't associate with her. I probably made her afraid of everything. For that purpose let just say her father made her like that. Example: Claustrophobia, Valentine locked he within small rooms with himself and continually beat her, in that sense she associates small spaces with fear therefore she is claustrophobic. Oh and in each scenario the end comes out differently, in some she might die, he might die or neither might die, it just depends what the situation calls for.**_

_**Ok, I only have one song for this, I never normally have to use them but I thought it would be perfect for how Sebastian felt about Clary, even in the book.**_

_**Part 8 – Let You Go, Chase & Status**_

_**Coulrophobia – Open Your Eyes, Snow Patrol**_

_**I think I'm going to use that for my last chapter as well…**_

.o.O.o. (1st Person/Time Jump)

He's on top of me, golden eyes burning with uncontrolled hatred, I was defenceless against him, all I have left is that shred of humanity Sebastian may have left him with. But I can't hope, he will be the one to kill me, maybe the only person in my life I really cared about. My father abused me, my brother is an evil sociopath and my mother died before I could remember her. I never really had friends, I kept to myself, unleashing my emotions on to a blank page. It was all I needed…at the time…

But there he was, above me, the cracked shard of mirror in his bleeding hand, reflecting my freighted face at a dozen different angles, this is the end, at the hands of the one I love most.

He brings the shard down.

.o.O.o. (3rd/Present Time)

They were back in that room again, but this time Clary was with him. Sebastian is grinning, bastard, he loves destroying his own sister. He had hoped that he would take it easy on his own blood

In that moment Jace wished he had never met her, because then he wouldn't have to care, wouldn't want to keep living, and wouldn't want to sacrifice everything. So for now, that's what he would do, for now he just…wouldn't.

.o.O.o.

Sebastian shoved her towards the ground effectively winding her. "C'mon sis gotta do better than that shame to see you down before we've even started." _Why does it seem like he doesn't mean beat me to a pulp? _There was a more sinister meaning behind it. She got up only to have her head smashed against the wall, stars danced across her vision and the world tilted on its axis. Something cold came down around her wrists holding her up above and to the side as she slouched down.

She was now facing the blood splattered walls, Sebastian was behind her along with the table holding knife's, drills and other 'instruments.'

Angel, her head hurt, she couldn't concentrate on anything, all she could hear was her own blood running through her veins, all she could taste was the metallic tang of her own blood, all she could smell was the damp air that hung around the chamber. She didn't open her eyes, didn't want to, even when she heard the heavy footsteps of Sebastian coming closer, closer, face to face with her. Why couldn't he just leave her alone, why couldn't he have died in that car crash all those years ago, when she when she was sixteen?

**It was midnight, not the latest Clary had stayed up, but tonight was special, he father hadn't touched her, in fact, he had avoided her. Why? She didn't know, she was just grateful that he had.**

**Now, that fact that she couldn't get to sleep – her brother wasn't here, he always got home before her unless he had practice but tonight, he didn't. And even if it had been moved, you don't spend until midnight or remotely ****close to that time, playing football.**

**That's when someone knocked on the door.**

**Her father was rich and could afford anything he wanted, including the biggest, most modern house on the street.**

**When you entered the first thing you would see what the great staircase on the left leading up the side of the wall onto an overhang that overlooked the whole entrance hall. That was where her room was, a lone door on the balcony faced the front door, and she had a perfect view of everything. To the right most of the wall had been knocked out to show a kitchen, completed with an island and breakfast bar in the colours of black and white. To the left a blank wall with framed landscapes; and directly in fount of her stood the towering figure of her dad framed in the police cars headlights, flashing blue, red, blue, red. Talking to a police officer himself.**

"**We are sorry to tell you this Sir, but your son, Jonathan Christopher Morgenstern, is dead. He died in a car crash earlier tonight coming from a party, we think that he was drunk and that's how he managed to crash."**

**Valentine nodded; from Clary's vantage point she couldn't see his eyes.**

"**Thank you for telling me this, but how do you know it was him?"**

"**Unfortunately we couldn't tell for sure that it was your son in the car, but who else would it be, also one person who witnessed the accident said there was indeed a boy matching your sons description in the car."**

**Valentine nodded, "I think I would like some time alone with my daughter, to break it quietly, after the death of her mother…" He trailed off.**

**The police officer nodded, said goodbye and went back to work, forgetting all about the man with the soulless black eyes or the small red-headed girl watching, he never thought of them again, it was the way police officers survived, care enough to help, but not enough to jump.**

**He didn't know that that night Clary got the worst beating she had ever had and the next day nursed two broken bones in her right hand.**

**Because the people whose job it is to notice were too blind to care.**

.o.O.o.

Just then in came Sebastian holding a struggling Jace.

If it was fair and Jace was up to scratch then he might had stood a chance but he wasn't and it gave her brother an advantage. He flung Jace into the wall and proceeded to chain him. Sebastian leaned forward and whispered into his ear, "I know what you're trying to do, let me help."

He reached into his pocket and took out a syringe, "this will change all your memories, well, the ones concerning Clary."

With that he took it and plunged it deep into Jace's leg, the liquid entered his blood stream.

And with that, Jace was knocked unconscious, letting the chemicals meddle with his mind and with that his heart.

.o.O.o.

"Ready Sis?"

She whimpered involuntarily as his took out a knife and made his way around, "I just love to hear your voice, so soft, so angelic, but I know what sounds better, your scream." He reached forward and used the tip of the knife to cut a long gash that followed the path of her face around her hairline.

Blood dripped down and splattered onto the floor but that wasn't the end of it, Sebastian continued his path with the knife, following the curve of her neck then down the side of her body. Her top was sticky with blood, the only thing keeping it stuck to her body and she was thankful for it, because this person before her certainly didn't act like her brother.

"Shame I only have to do this until you give us information on Valentine, I would just love to have some alone time, nothing to stop me from doing anything I want."

She whimpered again, this was worse than Valentine, at least he didn't imply rape, or even get close to that, he respected the bond between father and daughter at least... in a way.

"I don't know anything about Valentine." Her voice wavered out of fear though Sebastian took this as a sign that she was lying.

"Oh, my dear Clarissa," she flinched, that was what Valentine said, always what he said. "I would have thought you knew that I have a remarkable skill to know when someone isn't telling the truth, and I did live with you for sixteen years, I would know when you are and when you aren't."

He brought his fist up into her gut, cutting off her reply, he brought it up again, this time at her ribs, and she heard something crack. Black dots clouded her vision, she knew she was tough, after all those years with Valentine how could she not be?

But this was worse; way worse, it was like Sebastian was on steroids, every time he hit her it felt like a wrecking ball had crashed into her and with the undisguised delight in his eyes, she wanted to be sick, but all she could do was spit out blood from where she had bit her tongue.

Sebastian chuckled, "I always thought you were like me, but now I realise you're not. Your too angelic, and it was all dads fault, if he hadn't given our mother than mixture nothing would have happened and you would be like me, he chose the wrong one!" He was angry, at least Valentine controlled it, Sebastian seemed that he couldn't, he went from joking to destroyer in a seconds notice.

Angel help her.

"Enough of this, anyone could do this, even puny Simon could do this." He threw the knife across the room followed by spray of blood, her blood. He walked back behind her, his strides long and uneven.

A clatter, a hiss, bells, and the thrum of electricity.

Wind whistling, a crack, pain on her back, and the smell of burnt flesh.

And again, and again, five times, five lines across her back, they would never heal, she would be scarred for life, if she did live and the worst thing, she couldn't even bleed, the heat from the electricity burnt the wounds back together.

Un-healing, scarred, scared, alone.

.o.O.o.

The human body, at least when it had evolved, wasn't made to be under this much pain, it was made for flight instead of fight, to run, to be free, Clary wouldn't have been surprised if some humans were going to be born with wings and hollow bones next. But for those who were forced under this much pain, it would haunt them and leave them broken unable to comprehend that there was any good in the world, and if they were offered it, they would surely turn it down.

Clary had never experienced the feeling of being loved or even loving someone, the closest she had ever been was with Jace, then she felt safe, happy, and free from the terrors of the world she had had to face in her childhood. But here she was questioning her tactics all these years, was running really the best thing to do? Or was it just people who were weak that did that? But she had never run from Valentine, not until she had moved out.

Even then she had seen herself as a coward.

Was she?

Was incapable of being loved?

Incapable of loving in return?

Was she weak?

Did running make you weak?

Or maybe it was the other person, maybe it was the feeling of power over someone else that grounded a person to reality, for Valentine that would be abusing his daughter behind closed doors, for Sebastian this, holding a person's life in his hand and making them beg to take it away.

Were they the cowards?

Were they wrong?

Or was it just the natural order of things?

Punish those below you and get kicks from it…

She was snapped out of her mental monologue with the sound of a crack. It couldn't be, he wouldn't.

"Sometimes, the simplest are the hardest, you should know that."

And he dropped them; boiling hot coals raining down from above, some still alight with fire. Then bliss, water was being poured onto her, boiling, scalding, burning.

She screamed.

.o.O.o.

He was right, that was it, she was his. She would beg, she would plead, but mercy wouldn't be granted, not until she went over the edge, he knew she didn't have information on Valentine, but that gave him reason to drag this out. Turn her into something like him.

Time for phase two.

.o.O.o. (Queue: **Let You Go – Chase & Status**)

"Sweet, sweet, Clarissa." She flinched away from him; he sounded, and looked, just like Valentine. "Let's get you on the table," he unlocked her restraints, to which she fell onto him, he didn't move or provide any reaction apart to put her arms around her and haul her towards the steel table in the center of the room. She thrashed against him but he took it like it was nothing, was she just that, nothing?

"Can't wait for more Clarissa," he leaned in close his breath tickling her neck cause an involuntary shiver to run up her back, "I have you all to myself, no one is coming, think of all the things we can do." He ran his hands along her arms, his skin was so cold, none of the warmth that used to be there was, "what so you think Clarissa? Do you want a little alone time?" He looked into her eyes, "I think you do."

He ran his mouth down her neck reached her shoulder then gently sank his teeth into her neck, she whimpered. "I knew you wanted me Clarissa, as much as I want you." He ginned then ran his tongue back up her neck then kissed her along her jawbone; she tried to get him off, but something stopped her, a sharp pain in her thigh, she felt her limbs grow heavy. He reached he lips and grinned, "I knew you would come round," he ran his finger down her face, "I knew you would be mine in the end."

He crashed his lips to hers forcing her mouth to open to his. She screamed silently in her head, she couldn't move but she could feel everything he was doing to her. His hands inched up her legs before he ripped off her jeans and underwear while his mouth bruised her own.

He pulled back, "mine Clarissa, all mine. The Herondale boy will never have you." He gently undid all the buttons of her top and slipped her out of it. She lay on the table, unable to move in just her bra. He trailed a hand over her stomach before pulling his own shirt over her his head revealing his amazing physique. Not an ounce of fat was left, just pure muscle.

"You belong to me; no one else will have you, no one!" His face contorted with anger.

He unbuckled his belt sliding it out and dropping it onto the floor. His button was undone is seconds.

He leaned forward, "so would say what I feel for you is wrong, but to me, it doesn't feel that way. Lusting over your little sister isn't wrong, at least, I think so, and what I think is law, Clarissa. We belong together; I will not let you go."

.o.O.o.

Clary was unconscious on the table, it didn't matter, he had left his mark on her, she now was truly his, and no one could take her. She belonged to him; he could do whatever he wanted to her and nothing she could do would change that.

But just to be certain…

He took out his syringe and grabbed her arm roughly and plunged the needle into her arm not caring how much damage is caused.

Her green eyes opened filled with confusion, "Jace!?" She was looking at Sebastian.

.o.O.o.

Her vision was fuzzy and mind blank. Jace stood before her holding a white hot knife he must have put over a flame. His gold eyes were black.

Her mind struggled to comprehend, hadn't it been Jace in the cell?

No, it had been Sebastian. It was all wrong. She had two sets of memories, one where Jace was her brother!? And Sebastian, with gold eyes?

Everything she thought was certain, wasn't, had it been Jace or Sebastian? Sebastian or… who?

It wasn't right, it was someone else, someone with… gold eyes?

But the evidence was right in front of her, Jace holding a knife, "Jace!?"

It couldn't be Jace, could it? Jace with black eyes, somehow they didn't fit right.

He took the knife and dragged it down her leg, the wounds closing up strait after because of the heat, angel, it hurt, worse than those burns. He brought the knife down again on her leg, missing the bone purposefully.

It couldn't be Jace, Jace wasn't her **brother!**

Why?

How?

Something stopped her from knowing, holding her back.

Then it hit her like a bulldozer, it wasn't Jace, it was Sebastian, Jace was Sebastian, Sebastian had black eyes, not gold.

Her head pounded and dizziness cleared.

Above her now was her startled brother looking down at her in confusion.

"How?" He whispered it. Then he grew angry, _how dare she defy me, she belongs to me, i control her, nothing can take her, nothing!_

He grabbed the final syringe, "the power of the mind, such a great thing, but even that cannot beat itself." He stabbed down on her leg again.

It was like cold fire, burning her from the inside out.

"Let's see what you're afraid of."

.o.O.o.

**Claustrophobia**

Clary had always hated being in an small space, true she was small and that really didn't help her cause, it didn't help that her near-death experience when she was almost suffocated, from them two factors her Claustrophobia branched.

Not major; she only started to panic if there weren't three feet of space between her and that that enclosed her. And that's why she steered clear of store cupboards at school… and boys, they always seemed to be the ones that made 'innocent' girls lose their virginity in the store cupboard.

But now she had to enter one such space.

See, she'd been running away from Jessamine Lovelace, the schools head bitch, when she was dragged into one said cupboard by Jace Herondale – the poor boy who she, Jessamine, was currently pursuing even though she knew he already had a girlfriend.

He closed the door with a barely audible click and placed one of his hands over her mouth.

Jace Herondale practically ruled the school, if it had a food chain, he would be on top, followed by the headmaster, then male population, then the female population, he was the schools 'golden boy' and they all fawned over him. He was also her ex-boyfriend by two seconds.

See, he knew about her phobia, even went to hospital when she had had a panic attack. So why in the fucking hell did he just drag her into a fucking cupboard?

"What the hell Jace?" She whisper-shouted, which is surprisingly hard to do and then get someone to take you seriously, he gave her a look.

"Jessamine was coming after you again," he arms came around her holding her flush against his chest keeping her safe from the walls.

"But you know, I…" She couldn't bring herself to continue, she hated showing weakness.

"I know," he reached up and stroked her hair, calming her more than anything else could but it wasn't enough, she could still feel everything pressing down on her, suffocating her. She wrenched herself out of her arms and ran into the hallway. She heard a bang, then a scream, Jace! Then a searing pain.

She looked down, her top was soaking through with blood, she dropped to her knees only to be caught by Jace.

"No, you can't leave me, you can't, I need you!" He was muttering under his breath. Students poured out into the corridor, surrounding them but not coming any closer.

"Jace." He looked down at her, tears streaming down his cheeks.

"I love you." She smiled.

"I love you too." He said through the lump in his throat.

His scream echoed throughout the halls, filled with agony and pain.

That day a shooter had come into the school. By the end if the day, three were injured; two dead.

One got shot, the other committed suicide, their names – Clary Morgenstern and Jace Herondale.

.o.O.o.

**Hydrophobic**

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

Clary head pounded, _why did I leave my phone on again?_

She blindly reached over to her stand and grabbed her phone.

**Isabelle Lightwood**

Only Izzy would wake you up at seven after a night of clubbing.

"You better have a good reason to call or I'm blocking your number."

She heard Izzy giggle, "I have a great reason."

_So much for elaboration,_ "Pray tell…"

Another giggle, "Jace Herondale is back in town."

Clary sat bold upright, Jace had held her heart in his hand since they had first met, which true had been when she was drunk and happened to spill all her secrets, but hey, she didn't have many.

She hoped.

And then she kind of stalked him until he moved to England for six months, god British accents were sexy.

"Where?"

Izzy giggled again, _ok, what is it with the giggling?_ "Beach, he's surfing and we both know how much you love boys that surf." Clary cringed, it wasn't her fault all that every person she happened to date surfed, the beach was filled with hot guys… that all happened to surf.

"Meet me there, ten minutes."

She closed her phone, time to meet Apollo reincarnated.

.o.O.o.

Only a few select people knew about her phobia, her mother, her step-father, Isabelle, Alec, Simon, Magnus and… Jace. The last one had been a mistake; it wasn't her fault she'd drank too much.

He probably didn't remember anyway, he wasn't the innocent one in that situation, far from it.

Isabelle was waiting for her in their usual spot on the beach, far enough away from the water but close enough to check out the 'fishes.'

Izzy, as always, looked glamorous, strait black hair that fell to half way down her back, flawless skin and deep dark brown eyes – almost black.

"I knew you would come, you haven't dated **anyone** in seven months Clary and you used to get around, I mean, Sebastian, then his brother Jonathan. Jordan. Bat. Will. Jem even." Isabelle started listing off names of all the people she'd dated, and it did kind of make her sound like a slut. But she'd never really gone out with the last three, just talked and she'd kissed Sebastian once to get his creepy brother off her back!

"Isabelle, I only went out with two of those guys..." Izzy shot her a grin then pointed.

"There's the man himself, don't faint, but something happened to him overseas..."

Clary looked up, Izzy was right, something had happened. His hair was longer and curled at the ends just begging to be touched. High cheekbones, perfectly tanned skin and golden eyes, oh god, her gaze dropped to his bare chest, taking in the sight of pure muscle. _And we all thought it couldn't get any better… _

She dropped down next to Izzy, "oh… shit."

Her best friend looked up from her magazine, "I know, if I didn't have Simon…" She trailed off grinning. Clary really didn't want to know what she was thinking, though she and her had been friends since forever Izzy had one of the dirtiest minds known to man, Clary would bet anyone any amount of money that Izzy could turn anything they said back on them in some rude innuendo.

Yeah, she really took after her brother Alec… not. No, she was the female counterpart of Magnus Bane, who happened to be Alec's extremely sparkly boyfriend. Clary still couldn't find anything they had in common but then, what did Izzy have in common with Simon, who was the geekist geek Clary had ever met. The world was seriously messed up.

Izzy suddenly looked up and shoved the magazine in her face, "read that."

**It has just been released that Jace Herondale (17) will be playing the part as Jape in the new and upcoming movie; The Mortal Instruments after Alex Pettyfer (24), who was originally given the part, turned it down. They are still searching for the main leading role, Carla Farpine and her best friend Semon Loos. The Mortal Instruments is when Carla's mum is kidnapped and she is left in with Jape who happens to be part of a race called Shadowkillers, descendants from the Angel Ritz. More to come later on.**

Clary looked up, Jace, her Jace (well not hers but…) was going to be in a movie, the very same one that she herself was going to audition for.

"Isn't that the same movie you're going to audition for?" Izzy asked looking over at Jace.

Clary nodded not being able to say anything. Izzy's eyes went wide and she frantically pointed behind Clary.

"Hey Red." It couldn't be, it wasn't possible.

She turned around, there her stood, with a smirk plastered on his face.

"Hey Jace," she tried to smile but it came out more as a grimace.

"Hey, are you alright?"

She nodded, oh my fucking god, _Jace fucking Herondale is talking to me, really fucking talking, I should really say something before he thinks I'm retarded._

"Yeah, I'm fine, how was London?" _Really, you ask him about that, why would he come over if he wanted to talk about that, ahh, fuck this._

"Oh, it was great, but I couldn't really enjoy the girls, to busy getting ready for my audition."

_So that's why he came over._

"They told me that you were also auditioning, to be Carla Farpine, personally I think you could get away with it, it does say in the book that she's short, has freckles, green eyes and skin like a china dolls. A Raggedy Ann to her mother's Barbie Doll. Perfect description don't you think." He smirked.

_Oh he was so going to get it._

She leapt at him, taking them both by surprise, he fell backwards and they fell down the beach holding onto each other, strait towards the water.

Queue panic attack.

Her mouth went dry and breathing rapid as she tried to fill her lungs, she felt sick, her heart pounded against her chest like a bird desperately trying to find its way out of a cage. Her stomach hurt and she started uncontrollably shaking, everything was amplified, the sound of waves and people screaming for an ambulance. The whole was swirling around her and dark spots dotted her vision, her body broke out in cold sweat, she had to get away, from everything but she couldn't move, couldn't speak. Her thoughts scattered and she couldn't think, the only thing her brain could hold onto – water, she was surrounded by it; it was everywhere, pulling her, dragging her in its grasp. She could see it, her body disappearing under the waves taking away everything she had worked for.

She wanted the ground to open up and swallow her. She wished she'd never existed in the first place so that she wouldn't be a burden to anyone anymore. It was beating her, she was unable to perform something so normal so mundane, she was a failure of a person, a waste of space.

That was the weird thing, before this she'd never thought about killing herself, she would always question why someone would do that when they knew that people loved them and would miss them but in this time everything came crashing down. She was a sorry excuse for a human being so why shouldn't she?

Warm arms lifted her out of the water running her back over to where she and Izzy had been sitting, she was seeing but not comprehending, it was Jace, why would he do this for her?

He pressed his lips to her forehead and wrapped his arms around her surrounding her in his comforting embrace, "don't worry Clary, I'll never leave you, not for anything."

She fell unconscious with those words running round her head, _I'll never leave you, not for anything._

She decided then and there that this was the best day of her life… so far.

.o.O.o.

**Ceraunophobia**

Clary was watching the clock waiting for the final bell to ring, next to her Simon was asking her a question, "do you think I'm attractive?"

Clary almost slipped out of her chair, and looked into his eyes to see if he was serious.

"Well?"

She looked him over, she had to admit, he wasn't bad looking, in a geeky way. He had large brown eyes covered by his Harry Potter style glasses which were perched on the end of his nose, his brown hair was never tidy, more like - I've just got out of bed and I just don't care...

Altogether he was cute, not out of this world handsome but cute.

"You're not the worst looking boy in the world," she smiled slightly.

Simon slumped back into his chair, Clary was starting to get an idea what this was about, "is this about Izzy?"

Even though at that moment he was put down his face morphed into a grin and his eyes glazed over, _yep this was definitely about Izzy._

"Simon, just tell her, she's not going to come after you if you don't," she patted him on the shoulder and grabbed her bag just as the bell went.

"Bye Lewis."

.o.O.o.

She made her way back to her dorm, she would normally share with Izzy but she was out clubbing and had booked a room at a hotel nearby, no doubt how her night would end.

She switched on the TV casting the remote onto her side-table, grabbed a sprite from the mini fridge and sank onto her bed shoving her bag down the side.

Java Jones made his way on screen ready to deliver tonight's news cast.

"Sorry guys but tonight lock all your door and windows, there's going to be a storm going strong-"

She switched the channel, _not tonight, any night but tonight._

Normally when there was a storm she and Izzy would curl up together due to her irrational fear of them. Ever since she had seen a man struck dead by lightning she had been terrified of them - storms.

She wouldn't be able to sleep, the only thing that helped would be if someone else was with her but like she said Izzy was away... Having fun.

The only other person in this hell hole, due to it being a Friday and everyone was out partying, was Jace Herondale, his room was across from theirs but he was an obnoxious, arrogant, sarcastic asshat who had the looks of a Greek god. No way in hell was she going to ask **him** to help **her.**

She should at least get something to help her through the night...

She turned the TV off snatched her keys out of her bag and went to the nearest blockbusters; she was going to need it.

.o.O.o.

Four and a half hours later and Clary had finished watching 'John Tucker Must Die' and 'This Means War.' The storm was in full swing shaking the building and making the lights flicker, every time she heard a bang she would jump out of her seat slightly and back further away from the window.

She still had another three movies to get through but it wasn't looking good, it looked like the power would cut out any minute, not good.

She took the first one and slipped it into the player - Beastly started and she saw Alex Pettyfer standing on his podium making a speech. She'd just got to the part where the witch cursed him when a knock sounded at the door.

She let out a small scream and jumped backwards only to hear a dry chuckle.

Jace.

She hesitantly opened the door keep the chain in place in case he tries to get in, he had a nasty habit of going where he wasn't invited.

"Yes?" She asked in a sickeningly sweet voice.

"Let me in Clary," he leaned against the door making it creak under the pressure.

"Why should I?" She asked again in the same tone, winding each other up wasn't uncommon.

"Because you've been squeaking like Max every time you hear anything, it's getting on my nerves." Trust Jace to be Jace.

"If you haven't noticed, I love getting on your nerves so..." She went to close the door only to be blocked by his foot.

"Clary, please." Was she hearing correctly, Jace Herondale was saying please!

She unchained the door and fell back onto the bed, to startled to do anything but.

"Well this is cosy," he entered the room, taking in everything, from the discarded popcorn wrappers to the paused film glowing brightly on the TV.

"So what we watching?" He sat down right next to her scooting in closer then needed.

She inched away, "Beastly."

She pressed play and sat in determined silence, trying, but failing to watch him stalking the girl. Why look at him when you had a far better version sitting right next to you?

She was just about to say something when another crash of thunder sounded; she screamed and leapt right into Jace who automatically wrapped his arms around her, almost as if it was a reflex.

"Don't be scared Clary, I'm here."

"And why would that reassure me?" She said through clenched teeth, the truth was she rather liked how she was pressed up against him, but... She hated him...

Did she?

"Because Clary, I've been in love with you from the first time we saw each other." His voice shook, like he was nervous but it could also be from laughter and since her face was pressed right up against his chest she couldn't see his eyes to make sure.

"We were five."

"Ok, maybe not then but it doesn't change the fact that I still love you."

Clary stayed still, could this be true or was he just saying that to get in her pants?

"How do I know you're telling the truth?" She pulled away slightly to look into his eyes.

He reached for something hanging from around his neck. A ring, engraved with the letter M and stars, painted in a deep green colour

"This belonged to my father before he died and before that it belonged to his best friend who was murdered, and now I want to give it to you."

_He's just given me something that two dead men wore, how romantic. Note the sarcasm. _

He slipped the chain around her neck.

"Jace... I can't take this... It belongs to your father!" He silenced her with his finger pressed to her lip.

"Clary, you asked how I could prove to you that I love you; this is how I'm going to show you, I gave you my most prized possession. Do you believe me now?" His eyes were so filled with hope.

"Yes Jace, I believe you." She reached up and hugged him taking comfort in his presence when another clap of thunder sounded, she jumped up so her legs were wrapped around his hips and their faces were, for once, in line with each other.

"I guess you want me to stay?" He chuckled.

She nodded and nuzzled her face into the crook of his neck.

"Love you to."

.o.O.o.

**Astraphobia**

Clary didn't know what it was about them that made her scared.

Was it the fixed smile?

The constant laughing?

The lack of emotion?

The ability to act like something there not?

The fact that someone was hiding behind the mask?

Or maybe something… more?

Whatever it was it didn't change the fact that Clary was scared out of her mind because of them.

She even avoided thinking about them but since 'It.' was on she couldn't avoid it…

Her phone went off. She scrambled towards it only to have it go to the answer machine.

"_Hey Clary, just wanted to tell you that tomorrow I'll pick you up at 7:00, you know for the bonfire, I hope they have great horror stories, see you tomorrow."_

Izzy's voice cut off.

So much for having a great summer.

.o.O.o.

At seven on the dot Izzy arrived. Of course she had to re-pack all of Clarys bags so she had a least on pair of heals much to Clary's dismay.

"Can we just **go?**"

Izzy huffed and looked up from where she was choosing which tops were acceptable for Clary to bring. "Not until we have got over this fashion crisis."

She went back to what she was doing, finally picking out a suitable top and throwing it into the bag leaving Clary to fold it neatly.

"You've been at it an hour and it takes another to get there; we need to go to get to the bonfire for ten with our tents up."

Izzy murmured something incoherently. "Fine, let's go." She grabbed her hand and bag then dragged her out of the apartment.

.o.O.o.

Getting six people into a five seater car is not the best plan anyone could have. Alec was driving with Magnus riding shotgun. Simon and Izzy were squished right up to each other making out furiously which left Clary, unfortunately, to sit next to Jace.

It wasn't that she didn't like him, she'd had a crush on him forever, it was that just last year, in a prank to scare her he'd dressed up as a clown, fake smile and all. Now whenever she looked at him all she could see was that fixed grin and mad hair.

And though many people would see that as a reason to hate someone Clary knew that Jace just thought that it was a simple fear, like someone people afraid of spiders, a few screams later they would be fine. That was not what had happened, she'd had to go to hospital and she still had therapy sessions every Wednesday with one Hodge Starkweather.

Yeah, that's what happened.

But still it was better than nothing, though she did wish Simon and Izzy would stop making those noises right into her ear, it was disturbing… and now Simon was shirtless.

Next Alec and Magnus would be doing the same… while driving?

Magnus turned on the radio and Snow Patrol's 'Open Your Eyes' blared throughout the car.

_All this feels strange and untrue_

_And I won't waste a minute without you_

_My bones ache, my skin feels cold_

_And I'm getting so tired and so old_

Clary closed her eyes and leaned back.

_The anger swells in my guts_

_And I won't feel these slices and cuts_

_I want so much to open your eyes_

_'Cause I need you to look into mine _

Some people were so blind to what was before them. The girl in the song couldn't see how much he loved her until the very end.

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

But would he deserve someone who hadn't seen it in the first place?

_Get up, get out, get away from these liars_

_'Cause they don't get your soul or your fire_

_Take my hand, knot your fingers through mine_

_And we'll walk from this dark room for the last time_

Unless he could really see her for what she was, and help her see it to.

_Every minute from this minute now_

_We can do what we like anywhere_

_I want so much to open your eyes_

_'Cause I need you to look into mine_

Because if you don't I will be nothing?

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

_Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

And accept what she was given.

_All this feels strange and untrue_

_And I won't waste a minute without you_

.o.O.o.

It was midnight, the time to get out your creepiest stories and get the marshmallows. Of course, the fact that everyone was far from sober just added to the tension. When they had got here the first thing they had done was fix the tents but since they only had three and the two couples wanted to camp together Clary and Jace had ended up sharing. Then they had set off the find the rest of the people they had wanted to meet.

First were Maia and Jordan who had **finally **got together after two years of sickening sexual tension.

Then Simons friends – Eric, Matt and Kirk who all happened to be in a band along with Jordan, they weren't that band, they just wouldn't find themselves on 'The Top 40' anytime soon.

And finally was Aline Penhallow and Helen Blackthorn who were currently in a relationship, they'd even exchanged family rings.

They were all sitting round the campfire when Magnus spoke up, "anyone have a spooky story? 'Cause I know I have." He laughed along with everyone else bar Clary who hadn't even touched her glass.

"I've got one." It was Jace, it had to be him didn't it, he'd always had a captivating voice, able to spin a picture into your head.

**Alice Jones was just another student on a school night, in the house. Both her parents had gone to the cinema so that just left herself in the big three story house. She had her way to the living room and settled under her warm, fluffy blanket to watch CSI.**

**It was snowing, coating the ground in a fine layer of white just waiting for all the kids to come out and build snowmen.**

**About half-way through, when the adverts were playing Alice looked out the sliding glass doors only to see a wild eyed man, smiling sadistically at her holding a short serrated knife in his hand.**

**Terrified she grabbed her phone from the side and hurriedly called the police.**

**As her luck would have it a patrol car is only a street away from her. Within seconds the police car shows up and the two officers' analysis the scene. They tell her that no one could have been standing outside otherwise there would have been prints in the snow. He puts it down to her over active imagination and the fact she's watching a crime drama on the TV.**

**Just as they are about to leave one of the officers' checked behind the sofa Alice was sitting on, his eyes bug out and he motions wildly to an object lying on the floor. Alice and the remaining officer check to where he is pointing and gasp. **

**There on the floor are a set of wet footprints and a discarded knife.**

**Alice hadn't seen the man standing outside the window; she had seen his reflection behind her.**

Jace finished to a stunned silence. Alec checks behind him nervously as if a killer would come and stab him in the back.

Clary stares across the flames at Jace wondering who had told him that story and why?

Jordan grinned madly then stands up, "I got one!" He proclaims, only to be pulled down by Maia.

"It's a classic."

**Kira Johnson was the most popular girl in the small town of Idris. She had gorgeous long blond hair and big brown, doe-like eyes. She was average height and very athletic always taking on people older than her and, most of the time, winning. She was head of the swimming team and had won more medals then cared to remember.**

**She was also the most trusted babysitter in town.**

**Most Friday and Saturday nights she would be looking after the kids of Idris unless some competition landed on one of these dates in which case the parents would cancel their plans and come to cheer her one.**

**Everybody loved her.**

**It was on one of these nights when she tucked two kids into bed and made her way out of the room. She entered the living room and switched on the TV and watched another re-play of Twilight: New Moon, she'd just got up to the part where she watched as the months fly by since Edward had left, really sets a good impression of what to do if your boyfriend leaves, when she heard a noise from upstairs. So like any babysitter would she made her way upwards towards the children's room.**

**Inside two girls were sleeping soundly asleep though one of theirs, Emily, teddies had fallen to the floor; Kira picked it up and gently placed it back into the girl's arms before turning around to come face to face with a life size statue of a clown.**

Clary stiffened, another clown centred horror story, and she was trying to get over her fear. Jace got up and made his way around the circle to sit down next to her shoving Aline out the way. He put a comforting arm around her shoulder as she snuggled into his chest, forgetting all about the incident when he had dressed up, and found comfort in his warm chest.

**It was hideous, its painted smile malicious glint in its eye sent shivers down her spine. How Kira wasn't the type to have an illogical fear but she had never liked clowns, their jokes revolved around public humiliation and ever since she'd been in one of their acts she'd developed an indescribable hate towards them.**

**This was always the problem when she went to others houses, some children developed horrid fascinations with stuff that scared the wits of those with more developed minds, the innocence of childhood. **

**In this case, Emily. She loved clowns, collected miniature figures of them, dolls and stickers. Now, Kira guessed, she had moved onto statues, and large ones at that. It was a wonder how she managed to convince her parents to buy it for her.**

**She shook her head and went back downstairs to finish watching her movie but she couldn't, her mind kept on showing her the image of the clown in the bedroom.**

**She'd never seen anything quite like it. It was so life-like with it big, oversized red and orange jumpsuit paired with large black floppy shoes and the red balloon in its hand. Its hair was stringy and dyed a dull green, made to stick out in all directions at once. The eyes had a certain glint to them and that smile filled with jagged teeth, it sent a shiver up her spine.**

**She looked at the clock and sighed, it was 10:07pm, their parents had said they'd be here at ten, so where were they? Another noise came from above but she ignored it, problebly Emily's teddy dropping to the floor, again.**

**Bella was now hanging around Jacob who she greatly preferred over Edward who, in the third movie, had busted her car just because she wanted to see her best friend, who happened to be a werewolf. How was hanging out with a werewolf better than dating a vampire?**

**Suddenly the phone rang and she jumped, startled out of her mental debate on whether either werewolves or vampires were better.**

"**Hello, how may I help you?" She breathed down the phone, not her fault that it was on the other side of the room.**

"**Kira, are you alright?" Came the worried voice of Mr. Oliver.**

"**Yeah, everything cool, just jumpy, how long till you get back?"**

**Mr. Oliver sighed, explaining that they had a flat tire, "were waiting for someone to pick us up and drag us away."**

"**So you don't have a spare?"**

"**No, we took it out when we put in Emily's birthday present. It's rather large."**

**Kira's mind flashed back to the large clown statue.**

"**I can see that," she mused. "But how did she talk you into getting it? I mean, I know she loves clowns but that one just looks so evil. It's a wonder she doesn't have nightmares."**

**Mr. Oliver paused. "What do you mean?" He asked, his voice filled with confusion.**

"**The large clown statue that's in their room?" Amy said, chewing on the ends of her hair. **

**Mr. Oliver drew a deep breath. "Kira, get the girls out of the house. Run next door and call 999."**

"**But…" Amy protested, not understanding what was going on.**

"**Amy, listen to me. We didn't get Dawn a clown statue. We got her the trampoline that's in the backyard," said Mr. Oliver**

**Amy's eyes widened as the phone fell from her hand.**

**Out of instinct, she turned her head towards to the stairs.**

**Standing behind her, covered in blood, grinning that sinister grin, was the clown statue.**

Clary was shaking, barely holding it together. Magnus was grinning much like how the clown was described in the story.

"My turn."

**A MARRIED couple were going out for the evening and called in a teenage babysitter to take care of their three children. When she arrived they told her they probably wouldn't be back until late, and that the kids were already asleep so she needn't disturb them.**

**The babysitter starts doing her homework while awaiting a call from her boyfriend. After awhile the phone rings. She answers it, but hears no one on the other end — just silence, then whoever it is hangs up. After a few more minutes the phone rings again. She answers, and this time there's a man on the line who says, in a chilling voice, "Have you checked the children?"**

**Click.**

**At first she thinks it might have been the father calling to check up and he got interrupted, so she decides to ignore it. She goes back to her homework, then the phone rings again. "Have you checked the children?" says the creepy voice on the other end.**

**"Mr. Murphy?" she asks, but the caller hangs up again.**

**She decides to phone the restaurant where the parents said they'd be dining, but when she asks for Mr. Murphy she is told that he and his wife had left the restaurant 45 minutes earlier. So she calls the police and reports that a stranger has been calling her and hanging up. "Has he threatened you?" the dispatcher asks. No, she says. "Well, there's nothing we can really do about it. You could try reporting the prank caller to the phone company."**

**A few minutes go by and she gets another call. "Why haven't you checked the children?" the voice says.**

**"Who is this?" she asks, but he hangs up again. She dials 911 again and says, "I'm scared. I know he's out there, he's watching me."**

**"Have you seen him?" the dispatcher asks. She says no. "Well, there isn't much we can do about it," the dispatcher says. The babysitter goes into panic mode and pleads with him to help her. "Now, now, it'll be okay," he says. "Give me your number and street address, and if you can keep this guy on the phone for at least a minute we'll try to trace the call. What was your name again?"**

**"Linda."**

**"Okay, Linda, if he calls back we'll do our best to trace the call, but just keep calm. Can you do that for me?"**

**"Yes," she says, and hangs up. She decides to turn the lights down so she can see if anyone's outside, and that's when she gets another call.**

**"It's me," the familiar voice says. "Why did you turn the lights down?"**

**"Can you see me?" she asks, panicking.**

**"Yes," he says after a long pause.**

**"Look, you've scared me," she says. "I'm shaking. Are you happy? Is that what you wanted?"**

**"No."**

**"Then what do you want?" she asks.**

**Another long pause. "Your blood. All over me."**

**She slams the phone down, terrified. Almost immediately it rings again. "Leave me alone!" she screams, but it's the dispatcher calling back. His voice is urgent.**

**"Linda, we've traced that call. It's coming from another room inside the house. Get out of there! Now!"**

**She tears to the front door, attempting to unlock it and dash outside, only to find the chain at the top still latched. In the time it takes her to unhook it she sees a door open at the top of the stairs. Light streams from the children's bedroom, revealing the profile of a man standing just inside.**

**She finally gets the door open and bursts outside, only to find a cop standing on the doorstep with his gun drawn. At this point she's safe, of course, but when they capture the intruder and drag him downstairs in handcuffs, she sees he is covered in blood. Come to find out, all three children have all been murdered.**

They sit in silence.

Just then Izzy turns on the radio and the new reporter hurriedly explains about a killer being on the loose, in the same location as they are in now. Mutters break out until his next statement.

"He had been reported to be seen in a clown costume with a red balloon."

Now Clarys scared, she grips onto Jace burying her head into his chest taking comfort in his trademark pepper and citrus smell.

Alec stood up and started ushering people away.

Clary and Jace went back to their tent and even with his comforting arms around her she couldn't sleep, her mind brought up images of the clown in the story with its green hair and crooked teeth. And even when she did sleep its eyes haunted her dreams.

At one point she woke up to find Jace gone, curious she got up and zipped open the tent. Moonlight spilled into the confines lighting up the empty space, ignoring her fear she stepped out onto the soft earth, leaves crunching beneath her feet. It was the kind of scene she would like the paint. Picturesque, calm, but an underlying danger.

Something moved in her peripheral vision, a figure running away but it was too dark to see exactly.

She moved towards it only to see something hidden in the trees, swinging back and forth, back and forth. She spun on her heal and hesitantly walked forwards. She caught a flash of gold, "Jace?"

Again, "Jace, it's not funny."

She had reached the swinging figure, it moved out of the light, swinging inwards then outwards.

Clary screamed.

It was Jace hanging upside down.

And later in the daylight hours she would see a red balloon tied to the tree next to him and on the ground, scrawled in blood, his blood, were the words. **I never said it was.**

.o.O.o. (1st Person)

**Necrophobia**

Why couldn't **he** just leave me alone, didn't I deserve it. After all those years of constant abuse and when **he's** finally gone **he** won't go away!

Every night **he** would come back, even when I had Jace I would wake up screaming and he would put his arms around me and stroke my hair. I still don't know why he's still here, I'm not normal, I'm broken and I think the only thing that keeps me here is Jace even if **he **still kills me every night.

I see **him** in his grave, **his** nails scratching furiously until their broken and bleeding and each night **he's **closer than before and I know **he **will finally find me and kill me.

But for now, I will take comfort in the fact that Jace is here. After all Jace is the one who killed **him.**

Is it normal to be scared of something that is already dead?

But I have a reason; after all, it is **Valentine.**

.o.O.o. (3rd Person)

**Pyrophobia **

Clary never thought that she would die so young. In fact she'd never really thought about it at all. And now she was going to die because of a simple house fire. She could have got out but she couldn't, see, she was scared of fire.

If she'd just had the courage to run and jump, but she'd been paralyzed. So now she was in her room choking from all the fumes – not really a nice way to go.

Outside she heard the sound of water and a distant buzzing, a flame leapt and flickered. Burning her leg, she screamed.

She crawled away and made towards the window when a strong pair of arms lifted her up and out.

The man in a word was golden. Tan skin, blond hair and liquid amber eyes.

"Are you alright?" He voice was like low and harmonious, the perfect tone for a high melody.

"My leg," she whimpered.

He looked down, "we have an ambulance below, you'll be fine."

.o.O.o.

They were dead, all of them, luckily for her she was adopted by the Lightwoods, who also happened to be where Jace, the firefighter who had saved her, was adopted as well. Look liked things were looking up.

.o.O.o.

**Sebastian**

Clary was standing in white. Every way she looked all she saw was white, wrapping her in its embrace. Then Sebastian was there, duplicates of him surrounding her. Like a dozen different mirrors had reflected him for the intent purpose of scaring her. Not that she would tell him he scares her, she knew he knew. He took out his knife, the tip glowing white hot. And walked towards her, all versions of him did. And she couldn't do anything about it as all of then brought the glittering knife down.

.o.O.o.

Clary woke up gasping. She was back in her cell, at first glance it was empty but on closer inspection a figure was huddled into the corner. His head was bent low with his blond hair hiding his face from her view.

"Jace?"

He looked up and she flinched away from him, his eyes were filled with anger – at her.

"You never told me your last name, did you?" The hate in his voice was raw.

"W… Why do you want to know my l… Last name?" She stuttered, he sounded like Valentine when he told her she was worthless.

His eyes flashed, "Valentine Morgenstern."

She flinched again, visibly. Her green eyes darted around the room, filled with fear, "how do you know my father's name?"

He stood up, "because he killed my parents." His voice had risen above a shout, his face red with anger.

"I… I didn't know," she started shaking and trembling, backing up against the wall as he walked towards her.

"How could you not, you're his **daughter!** It explains everything, and isn't the saying like father like son and look how did that turn out? It's in your blood Clarissa, your just like your father." He lunged at her and knocked her over, a shard of glass in his hand.

.o.O.o.

**After Kaelie he'd been stuck in deep depression, he hardly left his apartment, the only times he did was to go to Pandemonium, to which he would get drunk and most likely end up in someone's bed with no recollection of what happened the night before. He also had a job to pay off for his lifestyle and his rent. He became the zombie that he had been when his parents had died, he would break girl's hearts left and right and he managed to earn the reputation he thought he had got rid of.**

**He wanted to feel something, anything, but he couldn't. Big holes were left in his memory so he stopped, he needed to do something.**

**Then they came for him. He ran away, feeling adrenaline running through his veins, it was the one thing that kept him running, the feeling of adventure of excitement.**

**And he promised then and there to himself he would never hurt anyone ever again because he realised then that all he had felt was empty.**

.o.O.o.

The glass stopped inches from her face, then was thrown to the side shattering into a dozen different pieces.

Jace backed away into a corner and started rocking himself, muttering, _"never hurt Clary, too good for you, never have a chance, never hurt her, get away."_

She sighed, a boy at her school had been like that, his name – Merlion, he had anger issues all his life and would lash out with no apparent reason, and of course there always was one reason that nobody else cared to consider.

This was just like that except Jace cold stop himself. Barely.

She walked towards him and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, "Jace?"

He flinched, "Jace, look at me."

He shook her head, refusing.

"Jace, I trust you." He stopped rocking then lifted his head.

"How can you trust **me **after what I tried to do to you," his voice was muffled.

"Jace, it wasn't your fault, you had every reason to do what you did, but you didn't you stopped. Jace, you **stopped**."

He finally looked at her and there was something in his eyes, something she couldn't place.

"I would never hurt you Clary, I-" He stopped suddenly, "the fact is I would never do anything, anything to you." His eyes were so serious, searching her own.

"Jace…" She reached a hand out and placed it on his face, "I believe you."

His face broke into a grin and he pulled her down into a one crushing hug, "Jace… Can't breathe." She managed to splutter out and he laughed, all trace of bitterness gone.

"Sorry," his smile was nervous, sheepish.

"S'kay, I've got over it." She smiled and they huddled together into the corner, unaware they were being watched.

.o.O.o.

_Stupid, why didn't it work! It always works! _Sebastian couldn't wrap his head around it, he backed away only you knock into someone's chest, he turned around and was faced by two of Seelie's henchmen, Pangborn and Blackwell grabbed his arms.

"You need to come with us." They lifted him up and dragged him back towards the courtyard, _like I didn't know she wouldn't try this._

_**Yes, longest chapter I have ever written, over 10,500 words, I don't think I can ever write that much again and half of it was spent on horror stories, I haven't slept for two days straight – that is what they did to me *sad***_

_**I refused to check over the horror stories after what they've done to me and it's my birthday on the 12th, sorry if there are any mistakes in that part **__**but *shivers* I can't bring myself to read them again. I just realized I have a phobia of clowns...**_

**_Like it? Love it? Want to give it a big hug ad kiss and want an update right away? Hate it? Want to throw it into a fire then throw the ashes into a sea? _**

**_Leave your comments._**

**_I need a Beta..._**

_**Snow**_

_**I need a beta…**_


End file.
